When it comes to the uncomfortable topic of layoffs, the research is clear: avoid layoffs where you can and take as long a strategic view as possible. Layoffs can have a highly detrimental impact on the culture of an organization by eroding trust, undermining shared values, and increasing negative employee behaviors. It is a traumatic event for the whole organization, and especially for the one being terminated.
Yet there are times, like the current COVID-19 crisis, when layoffs may be the unfortunate and unavoidable reality for your organization. How can you lead compassionately while carrying out such a painful agenda?
Perhaps if you’ve ever been laid off, you still remember the emotions of that difficult moment, and can viscerally understand the magnitude of your colleagues’ pain. Allow these feelings of empathy to help guide you into compassionate action.
To lead compassionately through layoffs requires an especially elevated sense of concern for your team members losing their job. This is not about you. And yet, the starting point for accomplishing this may seem counterintuitive: It is important to start with yourself. Your ability to focus on your team members is dependent on your ability to engage from a grounded and anchored personal position.
While these layoffs are much more difficult for your terminated colleagues, it is still difficult for you. Be willing to acknowledge your own discomfort in these circumstances. Acknowledging (to yourself only) that this is difficult for you strengthens your ability to acknowledge to your team members how difficult this is for them.
These firings do not define you, nor are they your fault. You must first deal with your own anxieties, fears, and guilt, so that you can give your full attention in the meeting to being present to and understanding of the colleague being laid off.
Try to connect with your team member on a human and personal level. Make eye contact. Ask questions, where appropriate, about how the person is. Sincerely display your kindest, warmest, most humane side. If your team member just wants to get your meeting over and get out of there, that’s fine. However, make yourself physically and emotionally available should they want to process, or cry, or talk.
Don’t try to “fix” the situation. This stinks. Period. Acknowledge that to yourself and to the people losing their jobs. Just as you should never say to someone after losing a pet, “Oh, you will get another dog soon,” don’t go there with jobs. It is too soon.
Of course, describe the details of whatever help your team member will be receiving – outplacement, severance, etc. – just don’t send the message that somehow the two cancel each other out. And don’t expect any appreciation for any assistance being provided – remember the colleague has just lost their livelihood.
Be completely present and listen deeply – for words, body language, and energetic cues. Scripting the hard parts of what you have to say is valuable. But don’t assume you know what your team member is going to say or think. Listen carefully and caringly for their reactions in case they are different from what you expected. You must be flexible and respond to what you are hearing in the meeting, and not only to what you have prepared for ahead of time.
Our research shows that, in crisis, team members feel things very differently than you do. They are quite likely hearing your words differently, too. Work hard to be present to them so you can understand where they are coming from.
Be prepared for many different reactions. Some people may be relieved. Some may be angry. Some may be resigned. Some may want to talk. Some may want to get out of the room as soon as possible. These reactions can be so different because they are dependent upon your colleague’s personal circumstances. These are THEIR reactions. Don’t take them personally.
Where possible (e.g. you have known or worked with the person, and there are aspects of them that you respect or admire), it can be helpful to say something kind and authentic like, “I always enjoyed your creative solutions/bright spirit/analytical precision, and will miss that.” This type of personal sharing can be comforting.
There is no solution that makes laying off workers palatable. It takes courage, humility, and most of all, compassion. Keep a compassionate, caring focus on your team member, and know that you are doing your best to extend your heart forward in these most difficult of circumstances.